October

I love October. There's always so much going on. And Memphis is rather pretty in autumn.

My birthday was a few weeks ago. I don't know if 27 is anything to celebrate though... Actually, earlier today, I forgot how old I am. It's that bad. My life was supposed to be very different by this point. But I try really hard to not think about that. So! Here are the birthday presents I got! lol.

Lovely Jenni gave me these. I can't even remember the last time someone other than my family gave me a birthday present...

She also made me this keychain. So sweet :3 It makes me smile every time I see it.

Jimmy & Aprele gave me these: a Lucky Brand guitar-playing-buddha bag, and a set of Juicy Couture perfume, lotion, & bath gel. Psychic! How did they know I wanted new perfume?! lol.

The piece de resistance! My beautiful 3DS from my parents. They are too good to me. Too bad school has kept me from playing it much :( But I can't wait to (re)play Ocarina of Time.

These boots were a birthday present from myself. Couldn't resist, they are just too cool.

On/near my birfday.

We also went to GMX a couple weeks ago. So much booze, so much fun:

 Skele-Jenni!

 I feel so short. Well, shorter than usual...

Aahhhh! MTS3K!!

Of course, I also love Halloween. Here are some highlights:

 

I usually avoid the "sexy ______" costumes, but I love that we were both "sexy" male characters.

 

Jenni makes a lovely droog ;)

 

Night 2 of Halloween weekend.

With heels, I almost look average height! lol

In the Air

For as long as I can remember, I've loved to stare at airplanes, I've loved to stare at the sky. As a child, before I had ever been on a plane, I dreamed of the places they were going. I would stare up from the swingset and watch them glide across the sky until they were obscured by trees. Watch the contrails soften and fade away.

Aren't they beautiful? Isn't it amazing that people are able to hurl several tons of metal into the sky and have it float? I've always thought they look like whales swimming in the sky...

In Memphis, there are always FedEx planes coming and going. I still find it difficult not to stare, whether I am walking or driving. People must think I am crazy. An adult shouldn't be so easily distracted by something so commonplace. These days, watching an airplane often reminds me of San Francisco, and the first time I ever flew.

I want to go back terribly. Today the sky and clouds remind me of San Francisco, Chinatown, mochi, lychee bubble tea, imported Japanese CDs. And also of the crushing depression when I returned home. Of how much I hate Murfreesboro.

And then I am reminded of where I thought I would be now, and what I would be doing. After coming back from San Francisco, I started taking fashion design classes. I thought about transferring schools (I should have), but decided it would be more practical to stay in Murfreesboro for a little longer. I was miserable during that time, with only music and trinkets to remind me of a better place. And years later, when I came home from Japan, it was exactly the same. Except I decided to do nursing school and move to Memphis. I hope it pays off.

Maybe that is why I can't stand to sit at home alone at night sometimes. During the day, you can try to work toward the life you want. Night is just wasted time. At night it's easier to think about dying before you have a chance to do everything you wanted. On a clear day, I can look up and think of the places I will go.

And now I bummed myself out. At dusk.

My hair & stuff

Yesterday I received some clip-in bangs that I ordered a couple weeks ago. It's pretty much the only frivolous purchase I've made all summer, and unlike hair extensions from the U.S., it only cost like $8 from http://kakabestgoods668.ecrater.com/. So of course, I had to immediately do some cam-whoring (and also because all my hours at work have been cut and everyone I know is working and I'm dying of boredom).

 

The same seller also has "bun extensions," which I think I will get at some point too ($6!). My hair is so fine that it's hard to make it into a decent-sized bun.

Do the bangs look realistic or obviously fake? I think they look pretty real, except in pics with a bright flash, which make the hair look too shiny & obviously synthetic. 

It's so hard to figure out anything interesting to do with my hair now that it's long and has to be conservative for school :( A couple months ago I decided to do this with my hair...

Shaved on one side. I only did it on one side and a relatively small area so that I can wear my hair down on that side to conceal it. The clip-in bangs help with that too. Idk, I'm contemplating cutting it all off again relatively soon. Long hair is so much trouble.

And yeah, I know my mirror looks dirty in all these pics. I cleaned it afterward :P

It took me forever to get any decent-looking photos. Bad face day, eh? So unphotogenic. Most of the pics I took just made me think I need a nose job. And probably also botox. And lip fillers. And a breast reduction :/

Summer

Such a long time since I posted anything... I'm almost as busy as I was during the semester, but now I'm spending all my time as a grocery store clerk. Yeah, totally where I was expecting to be at 26 & with two Bachelor degrees under my belt (thanks for the recession, rich old white dudes!). But at least it's an upscale grocery store and close to where I live. I wish U of M hadn't totally screwed us all over by canceling second semester summer nursing classes :/ But I keep reminding myself that rushing to be done with school never got me anywhere, and at least I'm not in Murfreesboro. I've just always wanted so much to not be in Tennessee &/or the South.

Anyway, here are some photos of the fireworks display in downtown Memphis on the 4th of July. Not very good quality pics, but they're from my cell phone, so what do you expect?

It was pretty cool because I watched them from the top of a (four story?) building. It reminded me of when I flew to San Francisco on the 4th a few years ago and had an aerial view of fireworks all over L.A. I was a still little sad, though, that I wasn't able to spend the 4th in Smithville like I usually do :/ I should be grateful though because if I did have summer classes like I expected, I wouldn't have been able to go to Smithville at all this summer to do some of this: